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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27265111">daisy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/meowjunhwi/pseuds/meowjunhwi'>meowjunhwi</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Pentagon (Korea Band), SEVENTEEN (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Friends With Benefits, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Unrequited Love, also hui and his wise words, bc im soft for them, svt ptg and nct china line friendship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:07:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,948</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27265111</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/meowjunhwi/pseuds/meowjunhwi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It was all a lie— the gentle hands on his skin, the lips that pulled his in a bruising kiss.</p>
<p>Yanan had known that falling in love with Wen Junhui would be a futile effort but in the end he takes the plunge and dives right in, even though he knows that Junhui wouldn’t even spare a second of his time looking at him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8, Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Yan An</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>daisy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>HELLO I FINALLY WROTE JUNAN AND I AM SO: HAPPY AAAAAAAA</p>
<p>I was listening to Daisy when I wrote this (it is such a good song I swear and I love it so so much I kept listening to it on loop) and I thought very hard on whether I should simply put "Daisy" as the title of this fic bc the song is more about heartbreak due to a relationship break up than unrequited feelings, but I searched what the flower itself may symbolize and tada, I decided to use it in the end OwO</p>
<p>Also, this is alternatively titled as: tides; or the correlation between tidal waves and falling in love by yan an. </p>
<p>I hope you enjoy this! I had originally planned a lot more, but I opted out of doing so because I think the way I wrote this and ended this one-shot is neat and wonderful enough on its own. Also, I want to mention the China-line friendship bc I remembered Yanan's live where he said Minghao was the one who made their gc and they all became close bc of Junhui and I am: absolutely soft, I love their friendship so much. </p>
<p>I'm not ruling out the possibility of writing more centered around this particular plot and universe because I might indulge myself with some YuYan and JunHao when I get in the mood lol.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The door opened loudly with a bang, and Yanan didn't even stop to worry about the possible dent that the door knob could possibly make against the pristine gray walls of his apartment unit.</p>
<p>He couldn’t, not when he currently has Junhui in his arms, their lips locked in a hungry and desperate kiss. A whine leaves Junhui’s pretty mouth as he grinds against Yanan’s thigh and it only serves to make Yanan forget about his little dilemma.</p>
<p>The wall could wait until the morning, but now he would have to lay Junhui down on the sheets and mess him up real good. The thought was enough to get Yanan going, pulling back from the kiss and dragging a dazed and slightly tipsy Junhui into his room.</p>
<p>Clothes were hastily removed from the length of their bodies and messily strewn around the room. Junhui plops down on his back on Yanan’s bed, pulling the taller along with him in his fall.</p>
<p>Junhui’s chest is heaving and his eyes are glazed with desire, a tad bit naughtiness swimming behind the fire in his hooded dark brown eyes.</p>
<p>Yanan could feel himself drowning the more time he spends staring at Junhui and his captivating eyes, the slope of his nose and the curve of his lips. The expanse of tan skin available for him to touch intimately, to trace and map out. The thing is, they had been doing this for almost two years and Yanan probably has Junhui memorized by now, could probably draw him in perfect detail— from the lines of his muscles to every mole that dotted his body— if he could (but he couldn’t and the most he could do is a stick drawing). But still, Yanan can’t get enough of looking and he probably spends a part of their time together merely staring at Junhui and his ethereal beauty.</p>
<p>“Take a picture so it would last, won’t you?” Junhui teases, snickering behind his hand when Yanan rolled his eyes in response.</p>
<p>In truth, Yanan would’ve already taken a picture of Junhui, but he doesn’t want something tangible to represent the time they spend together, especially in an intimate setting like this. It makes what they have look more intimate and <em>more</em> than what it should only be.</p>
<p>But Yanan has the memories, and memories, Hui had told him one time, are far more dangerous than the tangible things that represents them because no matter how much you cut off a film roll or burn the letters contained in a already-unsealed envelope, the memories stay— like leech, sticking to the deepest part of their minds and their hearts— and it would be a pain to let go especially if they had already implanted themselves and what should be strings unattached became a lot more than what it should’ve only been.</p>
<p>Junhui pulls him down by the neck for a kiss, legs tightening around his waist, and for a moment, Yanan basks in the warmth of his embrace before the coldness of the reality washes over him as if he had been plunged deep in the winter oceans.</p>
<p>Yanan leans down and mouths on the skin of Junhui’s shoulder, relishing in the tight and wet heat surrounding him. He speeds up and he clearly hears the sound of Junhui’s moan— heaven to his ears as he chants his name like a prayer. Then he comes and Yanan follows suit.</p>
<p>The warmth is still there, but it is gone soon when Junhui nudges him to move and leaves the bed, makes his way to the bathroom without a word, the earlier playfulness long gone and replaced with a heavy silence that promises a conversation Yanan is sure he wouldn’t like.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>*</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He knew it was all a lie— the gentleness of Junhui’s featherlight touches on his skin as he maps out the contours of Yanan’s body; the pair of lips that pull his in a bruising kiss, that trails heat with every press that at any moment Yanan feels like he will combust right there and then; the eyes that stare at him deeply, softening when he smiles and crinkling when he laughs.</p>
<p>He knew it was all a lie and Yanan should’ve just stayed content in the sidelines, as Junhui’s friend and sometimes his lover solely and strictly in bed.</p>
<p>Yet he did the last thing he had promised both himself and Junhui that he wouldn’t do and that was falling in love with him.</p>
<p>The thing is, technically, there isn’t something wrong with falling in love with Wen Junhui. He is smart, funny and downright one of the most caring people that graced to walk the earth. He is also very good at dancing and his voice is soothing to listen to, especially at the end of a very tough day. His confidence is admirable and his shyness is adorable. Yanan could probably list a lot more things about Junhui and his good points but that would probably take a lot more time and maybe a lot of pages if he is to write it down.</p>
<p>Technically, there is nothing wrong, but everyone knows (and by everyone, Yanan meant his own circle of friends, Junhui’s own circle of friends, and the ones that they share together) that falling in love with Wen Junhui is a futile effort because while platonically speaking, Junhui would give him all the time and affection he needs, when it comes to romance he wouldn’t be as generous. Hell, Junhui might not even give him the time of his day especially when he is hopelessly and irrevocably in love with Xu Minghao, contemporary art and dance major, Junhui’s roommate and the love of his youth.</p>
<p>So when Yanan realized that yes, he had been starting to have feelings for Junhui, he also realized just how fucked he was. And not in the literal and pleasurable sense. Nope.</p>
<p>Utterly fucked in what could probably be the most painful way considering that Junhui is the guy who he first had feelings for.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Way to go, Yanan.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hui had warned him before, that “Yanan, you’re going in too deep already,” but Yanan waves him off and confidently tells him, “No, I’m not and that is not going to happen.” Hui looks at him with doubtful eyes but Yanan chooses to ignore it.</p>
<p>At the end, Hui warns him to be careful but Yanan was too careless and he trips, and Junhui wasn’t there to help him up when he falls.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>*</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The arrangement starts when they were about to graduate college and Junhui’s supposed confession to Minghao was postponed because Minghao told him he is finally and officially dating the tall guy from his class named Kim Mingyu.</p>
<p>Junhui pulls him in a tight hug, pats his head and sincerely declares that he is genuinely happy for Minghao.</p>
<p>When he turns around though, Yanan could easily see the strain in his smile and the unshed tears in his eyes. So as a good friend, he walks over to him and wordlessly hands a red cup filled with questionable red liquid. Junhui downs it immediately.</p>
<p>In between cups of alcohol and dancing and drunk laughters and giggles, Junhui pulls Yanan in for a kiss and Yanan generously responds, even pulling Junhui in closer by the waist, much to the amusement of their group of same-age friends.</p>
<p>Yanan tastes the honey-like sweetness on Junhui’s tongue, from the alcohol and the lollipop that he had been sucking on ever since before Ten had pulled them to dance together. But there was also the bitterness underneath, from a confession left unsaid and a love that wasn’t meant to be.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>*</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Junhui comes back into the bedroom with his pants already on, his dress shirt hanging on his shoulders and left unbuttoned.</p>
<p>He slides into the bed next to Yanan, passes him a cigarette as they sit down with their shoulders pressed together and backs against the headboard.</p>
<p>Yanan lights up his cigarette and takes a whiff before passing the lighter on to Junhui who does the same. He tries so hard not to look at the way Junhui’s lips wrap around the butt of the cigarette stick.</p>
<p>For a while, it was quiet. Just them smoking their way through half of their cigarettes before it was disposed of in the tray Yanan keeps on his bedside table.</p>
<p>Then Junhui speaks, shattering the silence of the room and the dreamy illusion that Yanan had built around both of them every time they step inside his apartment locked in a heated kiss.</p>
<p>“I’m going to talk to Minghao tomorrow,” Junhui breathily says, and Yanan could see that he was nervous with the way his hands suddenly tightened on the material of his slacks.</p>
<p>“Gonna confess now?” Yanan asks casually. Junhui answers with a nod.</p>
<p>“Fucking finally,” he exclaims softly making Junhui look at him with wide eyes because of the crude language, which Yanan rarely uses. Yanan rolls his eyes at the reaction he received, “Junhui, you had been in love with him for years. One way or another, the truth about your feelings will be out in the open.”</p>
<p>“Yeah I know,” Junhui takes a pillow and hugs it to his chest, lips forming a slight pout as he continues to speak, “I’m still nervous though. Just because he had moved on from Mingyu doesn’t mean I automatically have a chance.”</p>
<p>Yanan wants to badly hit him on the back of his head to put some sense into him but he holds himself back. Instead he calmly tells him, “Jun, out of all the admirers that Minghao has, I’d say that you probably have the highest chance out of all of them. And I’m saying this with only honesty and no bias at all.”</p>
<p>Junhui eyes him doubtfully but Yanan just shrugs as he reaches over to take another cigarette, “Ask Renjun and Ten if you want more proof and reassurance.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>(He remembers that one time when he stepped into Guanheng and Yukhei’s newly-bought house for their housewarming party. Junhui was hanging off of him and while he was busy greeting Kun and Xiaojun and congratulating Yukhei and Guanheng, Yanan felt a pair of eyes on him-- only for him to turn and see Minghao looking at him and Junhui with eyes that is probably dissecting everything with just a simple, indiscernible gaze. It was gone as soon as Junhui bounded over to him, leaving Yanan with Kun and Xiaojun. Warmth filled Minghao’s eyes as he looked at Junhui with fondness that made something twist inside Yanan’s stomach, and he ignored Kun’s concerned look thrown at him for the rest of the evening.)</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Junhui just huffs and they settled into silence once again— with Junhui mulling over things and Yanan pretending that the whole conversation isn’t sending wave after wave of pain straight to his chest. Unrelenting, unforgiving. He was surprised he could still hold himself together when he expected that the moment Junhui opened his mouth, there would be tears ready to flow down his face like waterfalls.</p>
<p>“I should probably go and prepare for tomorrow,” Junhui says as he starts to move out of the bed. Yanan was tempted to pull him back and ask him to stay the night. But he couldn’t. Not anymore.</p>
<p>He had his time and now, his time is up.</p>
<p>“Yeah. I’m surprised you still asked me to fuck you when you’re planning a confession tomorrow for the love of your life.”</p>
<p>“Think of it as a goodbye fuck or something,” Junhui tells him playfully as he buttons up his shirt and tucks it inside his slacks.</p>
<p>“I’m not a pity-party Junhui.”</p>
<p>“I’m not saying you are. I’m just saying I’d probably miss your dick because it is an admittedly nice dick.”</p>
<p>Yanan chucks a pillow at him which Junhui expertly dodges. Then he faces him and sticks his tongue out at him childishly, “Bleh, you missed.”</p>
<p>“Get out of here, Wen Junhui,” Yanan laughs and Junhui laughs as well. Yanan ignores how the sound sends another wave of pain inside his chest.</p>
<p>“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be out of your hair,” Junhui says, then he walks over to Yanan and kisses him on the forehead, “Thank you, Yanan. For everything. I really appreciate it.”</p>
<p>“You’re only going to confess, Wen. No need to get sentimental on me like you’re about to go to war,” he says just to spite Junhui which proves to be effective when Junhui starts to whine like a kid telling him how he ruined the moment.</p>
<p>“Everyone thinks you’re <em>sooooo</em> kind when you’re actually evil. Scorpios and their true nature,” Junhui even pretends to shiver as he says that. Yanan just shoves him gently, “Just go,” he says defeatedly as if he is tired of his antics when in truth, Yanan just doesn’t know how much longer he could hold himself back from crying right then.</p>
<p>“Fineeee~ Wish me luck!” Junhui bids him goodbye and exits his room, the telltale sound of the lock clicking indicating that Yanan is finally alone in his house.</p>
<p>He takes a whiff from the cigarette and blows the smoke out.</p>
<p>Then the first tear of the night slides down his cheek, followed by another and then another, until they continuously come down like waterfalls and all Yanan could do was sit there and pity himself.</p>
<p>Because Junhui doesn't even have a fault in this. It is all Yanan and how he mindlessly let himself fall in love, foolishly made himself think that maybe he had a chance when in every lifetime, Junhui will always be in love with Xu Minghao.</p>
<p>Maybe in one of a thousand, he’d have his chance but he dare not make himself hope anymore.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>*</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He fell in love when the tide was high and the moon was full.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The waves crash against the sea wall, a few indiscernible feet below from where their legs are dangling as they sit on top, slowly consuming their ice creams and listening to the lull of the sea as the warm and salty summer breeze kisses their skin.</p>
<p>Junhui is sitting beside him, not close enough for them to fully touch, but just close enough for Yanan to feel their elbows graze every now and then.</p>
<p>He chances a look at his friend and sees how peaceful he looks-- half of his face hidden in the dark while the other is illuminated by the warm orange street lights lining the boardwalk; shoulders relaxed; strands of dark brown hair flitting around on his face, and he doesn’t even bother to brush it away.</p>
<p>Yanan’s finger’s twitch with the desire to do so, but he holds himself back.</p>
<p>He had known since they first met-- back in first year college, shoulders hunched in shyness, voices soft as they introduced themselves to each other; back when both of them were still trying to grow confidently with their own skin-- that Junhui is handsome with his sharp features, broad shoulders and natural slightly tan skin. He is the epitome of a good-looking man that the heavens had bestowed the Earth with.</p>
<p>Junhui underneath the moonlight, however, was beautiful, almost ethereal, in a way that Yanan had never before seen.</p>
<p>Or maybe he only acknowledged it now, as he looked at him. <em>Really </em>looked at him. He realized he had been doing a lot of <em>looking </em>the past few days and Hui’s warning of “be careful” rings in his mind but he ignores it in favor of imprinting at the back of his mind a picture of a serene-looking Junhui bathed in the moonlight.</p>
<p>The realization of his feelings would come a week after-- when he wakes up next to a still-sleeping Junhui, snoring softly and wrapped in the baby comforter of Yanan’s bed, a kiss on the lips that rouses the sleeping beauty and wakes him up with a smile that almost made Yanan blush at its beauty.</p>
<p>For now though, he basks in his ignorance and denial; in Junhui’s company and tries to ground himself by thinking of the ice cream dripping into his fingers and making it sticky, instead of entertaining the thought of kissing Junhui right there and then.</p>
<p>“Ready to go?” Junhui asks him, pulling Yanan out of his reverie. Yanan merely nods, so Junhui stands up and offers his hand out to help Yanan to his feet. Using his clean and free hand, he takes Junhui’s hand and hefts himself up.</p>
<p>Then they started walking back to Yanan’s car to drive to Kun’s place where they all agreed to meet after the week to watch movies and play some board games to celebrate the weekend before Monday comes around and they have to go back to work again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The waves crash against the sea wall, loud in the silence of the evening.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>In his chest, his heart thunders against his rib cage when Junhui wraps his fingers around his wrist, pulling him along when he starts to run back to where Yanan’s car was parked. It was spontaneous, just as all things are with Junhui, and Yanan loves it, especially the youthful sparkle in Junhui’s eyes as his laughter reaches his ears.</p>
<p>The realization would come at a later date, that Yanan was in love with the moon and all its phases and like a tide that is attracted with the pull of the moon’s gravity, Yanan finds himself caught in Junhui’s orbit, too late to step back.</p>
<p>But the moon is in love with the star and all the tide could do was to merely look as it rages in the dark oceans beneath the night sky where the celestial lovers celebrate their love.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading! I hope you could leave some comments on what you think about this fic &lt;3 and kudos would be very much appreciated!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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